Long Term Effects of Narcissistic Abuse
Impact of Childhood Trauma Lasts A Lifetime
Written by Narcissistic Abuse Expert and Recovery Coach Randi Fine
Narcissistic Abuse Awareness and Guidance with Randi Fine
If you are experiencing the seemingly never-ending effects of childhood narcissistic abuse, you are not alone. The long term effects of narcissistic abuse sets children up for a lifetime of and a plethora of frustrating issues in adulthood.
The most obvious issues experienced by adult children of narcissistic abuse (ACON's) are emotional disorientation, cognitive thinking distortions, self-destructive behaviors, difficulty forming healthy relationships, difficulty with family issues, feelings of invisibility and insignificance, and a variety of mental disorders. When addressed by mental health specialists in narcissistic abuse, these symptoms can be alleviated. They are very treatable.
The next level of symptoms, such as post traumatic (and complex post traumatic) stress disorder, anxiety disorders, panic disorders, and social engagement disorders, are rooted in dysfunctional autonomic nervous systems that were poorly influenced in childhood and became worse over time. These conditions can be managed with medication, meditation, breathing techniques, yoga, EMDR, and various trauma release therapies.
At the deepest level lies somatic issues; multiple, persistent physical complaints that may be undetectable through blood work, scans, and physical examination, often labeled by the medical community as psychosomatic. These symptoms may be experienced as chronic fatigue, physical pain, autoimmune disorders and allergies, mast cell activation syndrome, digestive issues and disorders, food sensitivities, headaches, dizziness, dermatological symptoms, respiratory symptoms, cardiovascular symptoms, naso-ocular symptoms, brain fog, and many others. These may plague ACON's for a lifetime and send them on wild goose chases in search of relief and remedies.
What makes childhood trauma related somatic symptoms so difficult is that one symptom may lead to another, compounding the problem and eventually becoming too interwoven to identify. Or the issues may surface sporadically or at different times causing a Whack-a-mole effect. In any case the person's quality of life suffers.
While the medical community may scratch their heads when presented with these issues, there are holistic practitioners, functional medicine doctors, acupuncturists, massage therapists, and energy workers/healers who can help ease symptoms. While they may be managed, they are rarely resolved.
This is very frustrating and exhausting for ACON's to deal with. The lack of resiliency caused by these disorders, and the unpredictability of them can affect ACON's ability to work and support themselves, affect their ability to parent, make exercising very difficult to do, prevent them from traveling, cause sleep disorders, cause mood disorders, and may negatively effect their relationships with others. These symptoms can also be very isolating.
As an adult who has experienced narcissistic abuse in childhood, it's crucial to recognize the profound impact it has had on your life. Your feelings are valid, and you are not alone in this journey. The emotional scars from such trauma can linger, and it's completely normal to feel the way you do.
There may be days when you function well and days when you can barely function at all. All you can do is ride the wave and accept it, with the understanding that tomorrow may be better. Do not get frustrated with yourself or angry at the condition. That kind of resistance will make you feel worse and prolong your suffering.
Show yourself compassion and love. Wrap your arms around yourself in a comforting hug. Affirm yourself with positive thoughts. Take the time to rest when you feel the need. Don’t exceed your boundaries. Cherish your body for all the incredible things it accomplishes. Focus on gratitude—you have so much to appreciate in your life.
If you're in need of emotional support, I encourage you to reach out. My professional experience is valuable, but as an ACON, I truly understand the feelings you're experiencing, having spent five decades on my own healing journey. I’m here to provide compassionate assistance as you work through this.
Randi Fine is an internationally renowned narcissistic abuse expert and recovery coach, and the author of the groundbreaking book Close Encounters of the Worst Kind: The Narcissistic Abuse Survivor’s Guide to Healing and Recovery Second Edition, the most comprehensive, well-researched, and up-to-date book on this subject. In addition to helping survivors recognize their abuse and heal from it, this book teaches mental health professionals how to recognize and properly treat the associated abuse syndrome. She is also the author of the official companion workbook Close Encounters of the Worst Kind: A Comprehensive Workbook for Survivors of Narcissistic Abuse. Randi Fine is the author of Cliffedge Road: A Memoir, the first and only book to characterize the life-long progression of complications caused by narcissistic child abuse. Â
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