
Whether to Excuse or Not Excuse Your Narcissistic Abuser's Behavior
Written by Rand Fine
Narcissistic Abuse Awareness and Guidance with Randi Fine
Are you struggling with the dilemma of whether to excuse or not to excuse your narcissistic abuser's behavior? If a personality disorder is a mental illness, is the person truly responsible or accountable for his or her behavior?
Narcissists condition us to sacrifice our needs for theirs. That paired with our sympathetic, forgiving natures causes us to overlook our own suffering and excuse the despicable behavior of our abusers.
Should we excuse them for actions we believe they cannot control? Should we excuse them if they can control their behavior but find it difficult to do so? What if they are in complete control of their behavior?
Some say that narcissists do what they do without conscious regard; that they do not premeditate their campaign of abuse. And when they are functioning on a conscious level they are unable to predict the outcome of their actions or exercise control over their behavior.
Narcissists do lack impulse control. But are they entirely at the mercy of their personality disorder?